How I wish I could make myself laugh always and would no longer dwell in in loneliness...

How I wish it's not just my mouth that widens or stretches when I smiles or laugh, I wish my heart also do. How I wish my laughter would suggest of my inner feeling or my inner voice but it was just too soft for others to hear. I believe that others would love to see my smiling but i never knew if they would also like to see my falling tears...
If only I could do something to make people understand me, accepts me, and love me for who I am.